Anticipatory grief for pets: How to cope when your pet Is aging
Dear Intuitive One,
Much like the story The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams, our pets reach a stage where their elbows are worn bare from long naps in front of the fire, their joints are a touch sore and creaky from years of long walks and adventures, and their elder hearts are bolstered by years of love. I understand this as the Velveteen Rabbit stage of life.
It’s the point of a pet’s life when they cross the threshold from being a pet to being a beloved elder.
The Velveteen Rabbit stage of life is nestled between middle age and starting to think about end-of-life care. It’s the "worn bare with love" stage, where there are still many adventures ahead—even if they all happen a touch slower (and include a long, deep nap on the car ride home).
Why anticipatory grief can feel so overwhelming
As precious as this stage is, it can come with the difficulty of knowing that there are more adventures, snuggles, and days together in this world behind than there are to come.
And with every age-related change you see, like when your elder cat struggles to get to the top of their scratcher to their favorite perch, or when your dog hesitates before jumping onto the sofa for a cuddle, it can become harder and harder to ward off the anticipatory grief. Speculation, projection, and worst-case scenarios have a way of cropping up, making it even harder to be in the now.
In this stage of life, I hear pets regularly share that what they want more than anything from you is connection and presence.
They want to feel your presence on walks and at mealtimes.
They want to know you are right there with them as their joints feel a little creaky and you understand they can’t do what they used to be able to do.
They want to feel connected with you as their body, sight and hearing changes as they age,
And they want the chance to tell you all about it from their unique perspective.
One of the beautiful gifts of animal communication is that it allows you to have deep, soulful conversations with your senior pet so you can truly understand what they are feeling and wanting for this precious (and sometimes challenging) stage of life.
Guessing and speculating about what our pets might be feeling and wanting is Kryptonite for empathic connection. The moment we start guessing, we get stuck in our heads and disconnected from our heart.
What your aging pet needs most from you
And yet… When our beloved pets reach a certain age, it is SO freaking hard to be present while also wading through the dread of what may lie ahead.
I believe the antidote lies in just talking with them about it so your understanding isn’t based on projections or guessing.
Animal communication gives you the chance to hear about how they are actually feeling (no guessing needed!) and about all the good things that bring them joy. And what kinds of accommodations they may be ready for so they can continue experiencing joyful moments with you, hopefully for years to come.
Is your pet a member of the Velveteen Rabbit club?
I have a very special offering for senior pets and the humans who love them.
This package gives you three months of intuitive conversations with your senior pet about how they are feeling in their aging body, what they want more of and less of, and support for both of you so you can adjust to the changes their aging brings with presence and love.
Unlike one-time sessions, this package helps you meet the evolving needs of your senior companion as they age while hearing about their wise insights about how your pet feels about this precious stage of their life.
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Sarah - Via Google Reviews
